Two Things Conservatives Need

1st, to realize that the democratic, egalitarian nightmare all around them is, largely, their own creation. As the French genius Tocqueville observed 150 years ago, "Americans are so enamored of equality that they would rather be equal in slavery than unequal in freedom." Only when they realize their own folly -- the deeply held but erroneous belief that everyone is the same -- will they be able to regain control of themselves and their country.

2nd, conservatives need to take back the liberal arts -- grammar, logic, rhetoric, great books, Latin and Greek, and all of that. They especially need to learn to tell a good story, to relearn the art of rhetoric. In this age of mass info-tainment, conservatives are so predictably modern and boring; they have no depth and their opinions are jerked higgledy-piggledy everyday by the likes of Limbaugh, Insanity, and Savage-Weiner. As a bonus, if conservatives took back the liberal arts, they would discover that they were also capturing the schools and the media as well without any added effort. A win-win for everyone.