No, it's not Chuck Norris; he's too clever to be roped into the fetid world political scene. It's Vlad the Russkie, who has just released his instructional video, "Vlad will kick your pansy Western Jew-Day-O!-Christian butts back to Hell," but marketed under the more benign title, "Learn Judo With Vladimir Putin."
Observe a real man in action:
The English Daily Mail feels that real men are gay. But you know they are really fantasizing about being pinned and impaled by Vlad.
Now, compare Russia's leader to ours: